Cracking the Code: Lying by Omission

A recent eye-opening dating experience (see UpDated Posting Alert below) has inspired me to create a list of questions that all single women need to ask men on or before their first date (or anything that may be perceived by one or both parties as a date). They are as follows:

• Are you currently, or have you ever been, married?
• Are you currently, or have you ever been, engaged?
• Do you have any children?
• Is it possible that you have children that you don’t know about?
• Scenario: We go to a restaurant that has been voted “most romantic restaurant” in a popular local publication. For well over an hour, we have great conversations about everything. You pay. Was this a date?
• If a woman sends you something for your birthday (let’s say…a monkey made entirely of balloons), is this an indication that (A) she’s flirting with you (B) she just wants to be friends with you or (C ) despite having a relatively low-paying job, she likes to buy people she barely knows random gifts

If his responses to these questions are to your liking, proceed. If not, punch him in the face and walk away. From now on, I will.